From the archives of juliawritesforyou.com

Can you remember the last time you did something just for you, without phoning a friend to go with? Can you remember the last time you had fun doing something with you and only you?

Is there anything you have always wanted to do but let fear stop you from trying? Places you always wanted to go or haven’t returned to in a long time? 

It can be so easy to get wrapped up in activities with other people. Of course, there is nothing wrong with enjoying another’s company —  love is how we survive — but it is all too easy to put yourself on the backburner. 

Perhaps you feel as though your spigot is completely tapped out. You don’t have the willpower to craft things with your hands, you just can’t think of anything to write, or you don’t feel like rolling out the yoga mat. 

During uninspired phases like these, it may prove beneficial to seek new outlets. Inspiration flows from unlikely sources, after all. 

Take a moment to think about what thrilled you as a child.  

What is stopping you from doing what you want to do, right now?

Nurturing Your Inner Child

Doing things for you, doing things that make you feel alive in some way, is essential for nurturing your inner child. 

Your inner child is the part of you that wants to create, explore, and connect with what’s below the surface. It’s the part of you that has always wanted to create, to spin in circles, and feel the warmth of a fire. 

As we grow older, many of our traits fit the mold of whoever we are around most. Oftentimes, that consists of blocked creatives, or those who have neglected their inner child for quite some time. This can cause us to end up blocking ourselves and neglecting our own inner child. 

Maybe your inner child wanted to be a singer, a dancer, or an actor, but someone said, “You can’t make a living like that, you know?” or, “What makes you think you can make it?” 

Over time, that inner child becomes afraid of seeking out what they really love to do. The child-like curiosity gets packed away and buried with old toys in the closet. 

But it’s never too late to unbox what you’ve intentionally, or unintentionally, kept tucked away for all these years.

Overcoming Fear 

Consider taking yourself on a solo date, or a personalized outing. To accomplish your solo date, you may have to put some fears to the side, and ignore that inner bully or critic that we all have to some extent. 

Alone time can be scary. You are forced to sit with your feelings, and it can be really uncomfortable. Being alone can get awfully quiet. 

But spending time alone is how we truly get to know ourselves. 

Taking yourself on a solo adventure, even if just to the dollar store, can invoke a ton of fear for many of us. Leaving the house can be daunting when traffic and parking are involved. Or maybe you don’t want to take a long train ride alone on your day off. You likely prefer to do things with family and friends, I get it. 

Whatever reason you could have for not doing something or not going somewhere alone, you may just have to force yourself to do it anyway. 

See what happens when you don’t head back home after a slight inconvenience, and when you face your fears. You may just end up having a better time than you thought, and learn something new about yourself. 

Grow your confidence and willingness to do things alone, simply by doing it. 

Going at Your Own Pace

Along with conquering fear, going out on your own gives you the ability to explore at your own pace. You can spend as much time perusing a rack of clothes in a thrift store as you so please. You can make your way home whenever you’ve had your fill, rather than leaving sooner or staying longer than you’d like. 

Going on your own occasional adventures gives you the space to think, to experience, to be a witness to your experience. Rather than soak up someone else’s feelings about the view or weather, you can think quietly to yourself. How does this experience make you feel?  

Solo dates don’t have to be anything too complicated. You could simply go to the dollar store to buy some bubbles or candy, check out the new exhibit at a local museum, or walk around your neighborhood to hunt for street art. Treat yourself to an ice cream cone.

You may come across a new idea or something fun to wear dancing. You might end up soaked and frustrated in the rain while heading back from a walk, or you lose something you just bought. Don’t let small things discourage you or keep you from taking another step forward. 

On the days you most lack inspiration to dance, write, paint, or whatever it is you love to do, take a step in a different direction. See what you discover. 

Start by making a list of things that you want to do. Commit to squeezing in a date with yourself each week (or at least monthly, if you can’t make it happen each week). 

Some solo date ideas:

• Go on a hike. Revisit a favorite trail near you or explore new trails via AllTrails.com. If you don’t live near any hiking spots, take a day trip out of the city or walk around your favorite neighborhood. 
• Check out a metaphysical shop. Peruse tarot decks, books, and an assortment of differently-shaped and sized crystals, and sift through healing herbs. Whether you have never been to a metaphysical, or “new age” store, or you have a favorite shop nearby, approach the experience with child-like curiosity. 
• Go antiquing/thrifting. You never know what random treasures and weird secondhand finds await you at nearby antique and thrift stores. Go with the intention of buying or taking a picture of at least one ridiculous item you come across. You may even find a dope new sweater, too. 
• Explore the dollar store. Make your way through each aisle. Pick out five items that don’t have anything to do with cleaning, but spark joy or inspiration. What makes you feel like a child again? 
• Visit a nearby garden or conservatory. Breathe in the aromatherapy. Take photos of flowers and fascinating plants. Slowly make your way through and make a mental note of what you see. 
• Pick out a record or CD from a local record store. As great as streaming can be, there is still something quite pure and raw about picking through bins of vinyl and stacks of CDs while something edgy plays on the record store’s sound system. 
• Read a book at a coffee shop. While you may want to stick with coffee shops that feature outdoor patios for now, this is still a great way to get out of your usual reading space. If there are too many distractions to make reading possible in public, grab a notebook and write about what you observe at the coffee shop or what has been on your mind lately. 

Reinstate your view of the world from the eyes of a child and see what happens.

(Safety first: be sure to let someone know when and where you are going.)

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